The Problem With Being Present With My Family

| Guest Post | Nathan Foster |

I love my family. 

I can’t begin to describe the intimate connection I feel when I think of my kids. I never knew I could love this much. 

Yet I’m not really a very good father. Can I admit that I’m easily distracted and often get bored when I hang out with my kids? In spite of my persistent desire to wake them up at night because I miss them, in spite of the butterflies I get when I stare at them, sometimes I can’t handle more the 15 minutes of running around the park or playing hide and seek. 

I often wonder what is wrong with me that after a couple of hours of watching my kids I’m anxious to run away.

Starting at Home

| Guest Post | Nathan Foster |

How do we know when we are loved?  Is it that look of acceptance, a smile and warm embrace?  Or is it when someone buys us crap we don’t need or lets us have our own way?  The ultimate expression of love has to be taking a bullet for someone, losing your life so someone else can live. You know, the Jesus way.  A heroic stranger sacrifices her own life to save that of a child about to be struck down by a wayward semi.  Our heroine just gave the child what potential time on earth she had left so that the kid could have more.  Minus the potential pain, dying for someone is giving them lots of potential time.  When we share our time, is this not the pinnacle of human sacrifice? 

Time lets us know that we are loved.  In periods of isolation or sadness when someone shares their time, it doesn’t just mean a lot-- it means everything.  The only thing I have any control over is what I do in this fleeting moment.  Time, my most valuable possession is quite possibly my only real possession.  (Excerpt from Wisdom Chaser).

Searching for Significance

| Guest post | Nathan Foster | 

I once heard an ultra-conservative guy who had built his ministry empire on the proselytizing of “family values” give his pseudo-retirement address. Apparently, after spending years of working at the ministry 60 to 80 hours per week, he had decided that it was time to slow down. Even at retirement, however, he seemed completely unaware of the notion that he may have spent more time focusing on his work than his own family. He was championing the value of being a workaholic.

My father and I once spent a couple of hours analyzing the lives of influential Christian men, both current and historic. With limited data, we tried to assess just how well famous people bore the name “Father.” It became clear to us that the history of evangelical men was largely a story of men who ditched their families (excerpt from Wisdom Chaser).

SICM and Nathan Foster

I'm leaving later today for one of my favorite places (at least in the US) - Whidbey Island.  

For the last several years the CCCU (Coalition of Christian Colleges and Universities) has hosted a Summer Institute for Campus Ministry (SICM) on this quaint little island off the coast of Seattle.  

Dr. Keith Anderson (President of Mars Hill Graduate School) and Rev. Bill Fischer (Dean of Christian Faith & Life at Huntington University) are the co-creators of this retreat-style spiritual formation experience and have served as co-hosts since the retreats' inception.  

I have attended this event  4 or 5 times now and it always seems to be the perfect mix of instruction, conversation, activity and relaxation.  The size (typically between 25 and 40 attendees) has always drawn me in as well!

This is a great place for me to be with colleagues and friends, to be renewed and encouraged in the midst of my summer, and to be challenged and shaped in some intentional ways.

This year's theme is 'Learning Spiritual Formation' and the plan is to focus on:

• How we learn spiritual formation?
• What is an effective way of spiritual formation that is always learning?
• What elements of formation are necessary for us to learn so that we may teach?